My World is Suddenly Upside Down … Where Do I Start?

The initial phase when a marriage or common-law relationship comes to an end is overwhelming and disorienting. This is a time when the road map of your life has been crumpled up and thrown in the fire. A new roadmap needs to be built, but that process is overwhelming when managing the emotional aspect of coping with the end of your significant relationship. Whether you are the leaver or the leavee, there are huge emotional obstacles that you will have to overcome over the following number of months.

In your first meeting with your lawyer, you will talk about the relationship and how and why it ended. Your lawyer will help you identify the issues that need to be considered and will create with you an action plan for how you can move forward with creating a new life. Often, the emotional
aspect will become easier when you know that someone is helping to solve the logistics of where you will live, how you will survive, how much you will have to pay, how you will preserve the assets that are meaningful or necessary to you, and how you will protect your relationship with your
children. Sometimes your lawyer will recommend that you seek the help of a good counsellor, to help you find clarity in what you want for the future.

Coming to see a lawyer is much like coming to see an architect when you are building a house. You are in charge of the overall design, but the lawyer helps to create the structural foundation for the life that you want to begin to unfold.